Cutting the Cord

"Hey, my friend did that. She keeps it in her fridge and puts it in oatmeal and stuff to eat. For her health."

That's not what I'm talking about. Cord-cutting is the unfortunately named act of unsubscribing to cable.

I've always had cable. Growing up, I wasn't allowed to watch half the stuff on it, but we still had it. We had basic cable which included ESPN and Nickelodeon, but not HBO.  So 12 year old Chris couldn't get his Oz fix :(

Then I moved to college and still had basic cable. Then I got a real person job and still had basic cable.

Then I moved to New York and my monthly bank statement was just an 8.5 x 11 piece of paper with a large "lolwut" stamped on it. So I made a huge life decision. I cut my cable cord.

I wasn't sure how my life would change. Maybe I'd work out more? Maybe I'd be more social? Maybe I'd read more? hahahahahahah

The downfalls:
  • Less sports
  • Can't DVR
    • Which means I watch current shows the day after via "legal" means on the internet
    • Which also means, I don't have one button access to the new season of Toddlers and Tiaras :( :( double frownies
  • My HD antenna has to be moved every time I change a channel
    • I'm tired of moving my antenna just to find out it's another episode of syndicated Two and a Half Men. If there was a Double Entendre Density Olympic event, that show would win Gold. 
  • My friends hate the fact that I don't have cable.

The upfalls:
  • They show sports at bars, so I hear.
  • I can say "I don't have cable" at parties, right before getting punched in mouth.
  • I'm saving so much money, I can Scrooge McDuck dive into it.

Cable is costly. I'd rather have that money to spend on expensive beer at bars while watching games even though I normally wouldn't spend the money because I'd be watching them at home on cable I paid for. Wait, now I'm confused.



  1. My DVR is officially full of the Toddlers and Tiaras you make me DVR for you when you're in town. Thanks

  2. I can't believe you are going to miss this:

  3. I don't have cable OR internet. You know what I do with my time? Watch seasons 2 and 3 of Parks and Rec on a constant loop. Sure it gets old after awhile buuuut I'm even nerdier and watch the commertaries to spice it up! And no, this has no way helped me save money like I thought it would. Good luck!


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